Bonkers ... a caveman humor short story

Bonkers ... a caveman humor short story

Norm Cowie

Science Fiction & Fantasy / Humor / Young Adult

When Bonk witnesses two musk oxen bulls fighting over their cows, he wonders if their technique would work with cavewomen.She must save the world. He must help her....Yin is the Savior of the ages. A young woman chosen to protect the world on its final day. A fighter, a sorcerer, a loner. She lives in the mountains, away from the prying eyes of the Kingdom and under the watchful protection of her guardian, Castor.No one knows she’s the Savior, and she must keep it that way.Then the army comes. With them is the handsome but cold Captain Yang. He takes Yin and Castor back to the capital, where she’s drafted into the army. If she can’t hold onto her secret and keep herself safe, she’ll die, and the world will die with her.Captain Yang has never met a woman like her. Impetuous, powerful, and determined, she’s too much to handle. But the army need her. Especially with war on the horizon. She has a secret though, one he’s determined to reveal. Yet time is against him, and he must fight to find out the truth before it’s too late.….Yin and Yang is a four-part fantasy adventure, subtly blended with sci-fi and romance.
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Mooned

Mooned

Norm Cowie

Science Fiction & Fantasy / Humor / Young Adult

When Ben Hurdt unexpectedly transforms into a werewolf in front of his pets, they investigate ... and then all human breaks out.(a short story by award winning humorist Norm Cowie)Selected Short Stories Featuring Cry Wolf features fifteen diverse short stories, subject matter including space travel, werewolves, cannibalism, and commitment issues. It includes The Dread Wolf's Bane, an exclusive short story set in the world of The Necromancer's Gambit.The Gambit: The Dread Wolf's Bane: Knight, a magical detective, intervenes when a young werewolf unable to remember who or what he is, is detained in juvenile hall on the night of a full moon.Canary: Miners struggle to maintain calm after a cave in.Lost In Space: A man prepares to meet his lover in orbit.Frankenstein Modern: A scientist attempts to give a new body to a terminally ill man.E-bort: A woman takes control of her future after she is raped.Undisciplined: A squad rescues a fellow soldier awaiting trial for his crimes, against their personal feelings.Ancestral Memory: Two buddies ponder the possibility of life as data storage, and the meaning of life.First Goodbye: A man searches for a woman he can't leave.Life Imprisonment: A homeless man looks for a way to get a comfortable home.Crickets: Four crickets cower from a spider.Hickbots: A man works alongside robots in the fields.I'm Sorry I Got Caught In Your House: A very awkward run-in at an ex's house.Space Beer: A disgraced pilot annoys his father, and works to develop space-proof beer.S'work: An unattractive man considers his reliance on female companionship-for-pay.Cry Wolf: After surviving the plane crash, a group of travellers ponders love, and resorts to cannibalism.
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The Big Huge Fat Vampire Bat

The Big Huge Fat Vampire Bat

Norm Cowie

Science Fiction & Fantasy / Humor / Young Adult

When teen vampire Erin's bat mysteriously gains weight, her friends Trug and Nevin investigate. Clues lead them to a graveyard and pizzeria. Then a zombie shows up and the guano hits the fan.A comedy short story by award-winning humorist Norm CowiePreston Cunningham and Arvie were the best of friends. Raised in the quaint New England Town of West Brookfield, Massachusetts, an hours drive from the world famous Tanglewood, the summer home of The Boston Pops Orchestra in the heart of The Berkshires.In a scheduled marathon, they were entered into the appropriate age category and trained for the race. Mr. Silverberg was their scoutmaster, and it was he who instilled the basic values in Preston's life.Life changed for the two young men when Preston was drafted into the Army in 1966, and Arvie entered helicopter flight school at Fort Rucker Alabama.With the possibility of serving two years in Vietnam, Preston opted for the Army's new four year program and within three months was assigned to one of the most prestigious military intelligence units in Europe.Following 16 months of living in a civilian status position in Frankfurt. The benefit of civilian clothes, an apartment in the center of the city and a chauffer, the Army in disregard of Preston's contract pulled him out of Germany and sent him to Vietnam.At about the same time, Arvie was assigned as a new young pilot to a medical unit in Vietnam. In January of 1969, Arvie was killed in a horrific air crash. Years later, at the dedication of The Vietnam Veteran's Memorial in Washington, D.C., it was by chance that Preston was searching for the names of his fallen comrades when he came upon Arvie's name on The Wall.Angered by the events of the war, ahd now as a civilian and able to put into words what he was prohibited from doing when he was a soldier, Preston wrote a poster poem about the pain and anger he suffered with the loss of his dear friend Arvid Silverberg.The poster poem was presentedto President Ronald Reagan and in a surprise move displayed it in the White House, and from that moment on The Wall - The Poem became a national best seller.UP UNTIL THIS TIME THE STORY IS TRUE BUT HERE ON IT IS FICTIONPreston Cunningham becomes the first Vietnam Veteran President of The United States, and returns to The Wall upon taking the oath of office and searches for Arvie's name...This book is free and it is the desire of this author that you will read the other books abailable in this series. Thank you!
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Were

Were

Norm Cowie

Science Fiction & Fantasy / Humor / Young Adult

When a tick gets infected by werewolf blood, things get a bit scary and more than a bit weird for Ryan and his little sister Carrie.A 3000 word short story by award-winning fantasy humor author Norm Cowie.Every housewife needs an alias. Donna Stone has one--and it happens to be government-sanctioned.Oh sure, you need to be ruthless to take on Russian mafia bosses, rogue dictators, and terrorists set on destroying the world. But it takes real killer instincts to survive suburbia. Try juggling the fifth grade phone tree during a shootout with skinhead arms dealers, or driving carpool while being chased by Chinese double agents.Donna’s life wasn’t always this complicated. Five years earlier she was just another woman with two preschoolers, a baby bump, and an adoring husband: Carl, with whom she lived happily ever after in a McMansion in the Orange County, California community of Hilldale. But Donna’s life was changed forever the night she delivered her baby: Carl’s car blew up on the way to the hospital.Turns out Carl was a “hard man”—an assassin—for the black ops organization known as Acme Industries. The hit on Carl was carried out by the Quorum, a terrorist cell he was tracking. The Quorum’s motto: “Show me the money.” Governments and corporations do as they’re told—or suffer bloody consequences.Carl left something behind that the Quorum wants badly. To protect herself and avenge Carl’s death, Donna joined Acme. Whereas her hostessing skills rival Martha Stewart’s, her marksmanship is second to none.A good thing, too, because the Quorum has planted a sleeper cell in Hilldale. For Donna, that’s too close for comfort. Will she be able to save her family before the Quorum blows up Los Angeles?Acme’s way of flushing out the Quorum is by “bringing Carl back from the dead.” But terrorism makes strange bedfellows--and brings new meaning to that old adage “Honey, I’m home…”*Not her real name."Adorable is not usually the word that comes to mind with a title like The Housewife Assassin’s Handbook, but it was just what I needed to pull me out of my reading doldrums. From the handy little homemaker/assassin tips at the beginning of each chapter to the thankless job of being a single parent with catty neighbors, this book hits all the right notes. Donna works for the good guys, Acme Industries, undercover by taking down drug lords and terrorists with a matter-0f-fact attitude while worrying about making it to her carpooling duties.Granted, the book ended with a hook that made me want to immediately get the next one, which is always a smart move and I was excited to see that there are actually 11 books in the series (including a prequel). I now want a week at the beach to read them all. Think Alias meets Desperate Housewives meets The Scarecrow and Mrs. King. Live a little, add some spice to your life, give this little book a try and give yourself a reason to smile. I know I did and now I’m completely smitten." -- Barbara Vey, BarbaraVey.com
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The Really Hot Adventures of Guy

The Really Hot Adventures of Guy

Norm Cowie

Science Fiction & Fantasy / Humor / Young Adult

When a pothead falls asleep while smoking a doobie, the resulting fire threatens the college, other students, and, more importantly, his stash. A 4500 short story by fantasy/humor author Norm Cowie, previously published in the anthology The Heat of the Moment.Kimberly Jordan never meant to hurt anyone.But once a DNA test reveals her longtime boyfriend, Damien, is her half-brother, plus she finds out she’s pregnant, she will go to any length to hide her horrible secret. Unfortunately for Kent Davenport, he’s the perfect fall guy for her plan, having recently revealed his love for her. But unfortunately for Kimberly, dirty little secrets always come out.A Tangled Web is the first book in the Dangerous Secrets series—a series of unrelated stories involving interracial romances with one other thing in common: one or more of the main characters has a secret so big, it threatens to derail, or even destroy, their most important relationships, their personal character, or their entire lives.The secrets are ‘dirty.’ Scandalous. Taboo.Secrets anyone would be wise to remain tight-lipped on.But in these tales, one way or another, that horrible secret gets out.Let the fallout begin.
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